Satan's Ten Commandments

1) You can worship any god you want.
2) Better to worship a false god than no God at all. Make idols out of power, money, fame, and sex and enjoy them unfetterdly.
3) Thou shalt put your hand up a trusted girl's dress or steal money from a church and say "God told me to do that".
4) Work 24/7 even on the Sabbath. Capitalism has made godliness unnecessary.
5) Hate and disrespect your parents, they are boring old authoritarian windbags and full of shit.
6) Kill anyone whom you don't like, or whom enrages you.
7) Take whatever you want from others and from the earth without putting anything back.
8) Go behind your partner's back and have affairs whenever you want. Stolen water tastes sweeter.
9) You can have whatever your neighbour has, just take it.
10) Lie, gossip about and talk about other people behind their backs whom you don't particularly like. The sooner they are out of the picture the better.